[L can actually relate to that sentiment, more often than not, needing to feign empathy because it cannot be felt genuinely. Even his concern for Mello and Near is self-serving; he is interested in preserving his own legacy, after all, ensuring that pieces of him are safe. It is not a remotely nurturing sentiment, though it can be mistaken as such by outside parties. L would never waste an opportunity to seem like he cares on a human level.]

Don't be. It's not like you brought the Witches here, is it?

And they'd better not all be dead. I understand the possibility... but it would be a tremendous blow to morale if they were, I think.

[L, like most humans, despises futile causes. He just tends to be more open about it.]