soul_campaign | FEB 23rd ; DAY ; VIDEO

(this is meant to be broadcast, because cross is actually unveiling a prototype for the sentries that he wants to build. but it's mostly Allen learning from years of experience with his master when he comes down to see him.)

Master..? ( he sounds weary, but you would too if you’ve known Cross as long as he has. ) Is this really as important as you said it was?

(there are a few of these steampunked babies sitting on cross' lab table, about four or so. they wake up and start talking in their autotuned sing-song voice.)

Hello, Allen Walker!

Never mind, I’ll come back later.

(too late, they're opening their sides and there are lasers pointed right towards him.)

Er—hello?

(it's almost too late -- before they start moving like pipe organs would (think of the first part of this on loop) of Mozart's Requiem and the sound of cross laughing his ass off.)

You should have seen your stupid face.

(he's tearing up, wiping tears from his one good eye with the corner of his white labcoat before standing in front of the recording.)

There wasn’t anything funny about that!!

Y'know if I could get more space and access to actual volunteers, I wouldn't make you go through this.

(then, it dawns on allen. he's being taped on purpose. he's being taped on purpose and this is broadcasting and cross just made an example out of him. he's been used for emotional blackmail.)

Master, you're terrible. Absolutely terrible.

Keep talking Allen, maybe next time there will be actual bullets and I'll train them to hunt you.

(cross cuts the feed off)

(ooc; bold is allen and italics is cross!)

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I loathe him.

I think you are being not entirely honest, because you did not have bullets in them. He is your... apprentice?

If you want to think that. I did rub him down with meat and throw him in the ocean once.

...Are you joking?

No, not really.

Then why does he visit you? And call him Master?

He's my stupid apprentice.

But apprentices are for training and keeping and encouraging! Not killing!

Really is that what I'm doing wrong?

[He opens his mouth before stopping.]

You are teasing me.

Yeah, that's what I'm doing.

I do not know why so many insist on teasing.

It's like you're clueless to the fact.

To what fact?

... Nothing, absolutely nothing.

If someone would explain then maybe I would not always be so easy to tease! But no one does!

People aren't teasing you, they're mocking you. Is that better?

That is rude, and I have done nothing rude to them. It makes nothing better.

Is it that you don't understand the paradigm of sarcasm?

[Gai looks down.]

I am very bad at it.

I hadn't noticed it.

(wait a second)

That was sarcasm.

...How does one get better at understanding it?

You just have to practice. And not say stupid stuff. And obvious stuff.

I try not to say stupid stuff, but I say obvious stuff oft-- ...Like that.

Look at that, we're having a moment.

[Video]

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