soul_campaign | 001 ♒ Text [March 12th]

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001 ♒ Text [March 12th]

wwhale its pretty fuckin obvvious wwhats goin on around here
breww clearly understands wworth when it seas it
evven if its made a feww fuckin mistakes along the wway its at least done somethin right finally
an ill havve you all fuckin knoww you should be grateful that im wwillin to help if any a you wweapons are powwerful enough an fuckin wworthy enough to be wwielded by me
for the sake a bein generous im wwillin to evven ovverlook all a your inferiority and subject myself to minglin wwith humans to get this shit done
lookin for a powwerful long ranged wweapon wwho wwants to be paired wwith the soon to be best fuckin meister in this entire fuckin city
an speakin a this fuckin place
noww im not usually one to complain but wwhy the FUCK are wwe in a desert
wwhat kind a masochistic douchebags actually build a city in a cod forsaken place like this
i can almost already feel my fuckin gills dryin out as wwe speak
if i die like some pathetic beached wwhale theres gonna be fuckin hell to pay
an wwhat the fuck is wwith these cheap livvin arrangements
youd think a city beggin for help wwould at least givve some fuckin decent accommodations to its fuckin savviors
but i suppose i can ovverlook that for noww
after all when dealin wwith so many loww class ingrates its not alwways easy to pinpoint the more wworthy ones
an speakin a loww class
...
evveryone wwho gets dragged here has their wweapons taken awway from them right
say if someone had a fuckin chainsaww disguised as somethin totally innocent
it wwould still be taken awway from them wwouldnt it
cause otherwwise fuck you shibusen for not doin your fuckin job a keepin the peace
an wwhat about freaky fuckin psychic powwers
does anyone get to keep those for wwhatevver reason
...
...
an those a you from my timeline
im not apologizin so dont fuckin ask me to
it wwasnt my fault

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kar i just got in a argument wwith sol ovver the whole thing wwith the killin an all an im really not in the mood to talk about it right noww
an sign told me a bunch a stuff i need to think about so ill be fuckin honest wwith you
i dont wwant to be sorry because it wwasnt my fuckin fault
not fully at least
but i need some fuckin time to think about it ok
so dont get on my ass about that i really dont need that right noww

WHAT THE HELL? SINCE WHEN HAVE YOU EVER GIVEN TWO FUCKS ABOUT BEING SORRY FOR ANYTHING?

ALL YOU EVER DO IS

[the grey messages end at that broken sentence for almost a minute while Karkat seethes. he's NOT happy, and Eridan is still royally pissing him off, but it's not like anything came of yelling at Eridan the last time he was here.]

YOU KNOW WHAT, FINE. UNLESS BREW CHANGES ITS MIND AGAIN, YOU'LL HAVE ALL THE TIME IN THE WORLD TO SIT AND STEW IN IT LIKE A NUMBSPONGED WIGGLER ROLLING IN ITS OWN REPULSIVE FLUIDS ANYWAY.

BUT I FUCKING *PROMISE* YOU, AMPORA. YOU'RE NOT PULLING ANY OF THAT CRAZYTIME KILLING SPREE BULLSHIT HERE. IF YOU SO MUCH AS WAVE A NUTRITIONAL LIFTING DEVICE AT SOMEONE TOO ENTHUSIASTICALLY, I'LL BE ON YOUR NUB SO FUCKING FAST IT'LL BREAK ALL KNOWN LAWS OF PHYSICS. WINDOWS WILL BE DEMOLISHED, BUILDINGS WILL CRUMBLE, PEOPLE WILL SCATTER IN A BLIND GODDAMN PANIC. IT WILL BE TERRIFYING FOR ALL INVOLVED, BUT MOSTLY FOR YOU.

nice to knoww howw much fuckin faith you havve in me kar
ill havve you fuckin knoww sign has already been talkin to me about fixin wwhat i fucked up
evven though im sure hes full a shit
ok wwell not really cause i think he actually fuckin believves wwhat he says
but hes wwrong an doesnt knoww wwhat hes talkin about wwith some things
but its more than anyone else has evver fuckin done for me
so i wwont do anything that wwould upset him
cause hes the only fuckin person wwhos bothered sayin that they were happy to havve seen me
an i wwont fuck that up an make him regret that

[yeah he's not laying this out where people can see.]

WHAT THE FUCK, ERIDAN.

I MEAN YEAH SIGNLESS IS REALLY WEIRD TO TALK TO AND HE ACTUALLY SEEMS TO BELIEVE ALL THAT SHIT HE SAYS, BUT

HE'S THE ONLY ONE WHO EVER TALKED TO YOU? SERIOUSLY? WHAT ABOUT FEFERI? OR KANAYA SOMETIMES? I MEAN, HELL, WHAT ABOUT *ME*? I'M THE ONE WHO SAT AROUND AND LISTENED TO ALL YOUR ROMANTIC PROBLEMS WITH VRISKA AND FEFERI, AND NEPETA AFTER SHE TURNED YOU DOWN THAT ONE TIME. AND GAVE YOU ADVICE, LIKE TO QUIT KILLING ALL YOUR ANGELS...

GOD DAMMIT, THOSE ANGELS. I JUST GOT MYSELF PISSED OFF ALL OVER AGAIN! WHAT THE HELL DID YOU KEEP DOING THAT FOR, IT MADE LOWAA DANGEROUS AS FUCK FOR EVERYONE AND THEY COULDN'T EVEN LEVEL YOU UP!

kar
thats not wwhat i fuckin meant
i mean
he was fuckin HAPPY to talk to me
he wwas nice an told me it wwas goin to be ok
an that i still had a chance
that i wwasnt a total fuck up
evven after i told him about the murders
an the genocide thing
an wwantin to be like dualscar
no ones evver been that nice to me before
evven fef an kan an you alwways havve shitty things to say about me wwhen i say somethin stupid
it wwas just kinda nice havvin someone wwho wwasnt judgin me for breathin wwrong
you wwere the one wwho said you wwould kill me next time wwe met
an i didnt evven knoww wwhat the fuck you wwere talkin about at the time

[oh man, Signless, this one's all yours. Karkat is a lot of untrollish things, but he's just not the guy who can say he's happy to see someone. or give them hugs and tell them it's okay.]

OH GOD DAMN IT, ERIDAN. I'M NOT GOING TO KILL YOU.

DON'T GET ME WRONG, YOU COMPLETELY FUCKING DESERVE IT AND SOMETIMES I WANT TO LIKE MOST PEOPLE WANT OXYGEN, BUT IF IT HAPPENS IT WON'T COME FROM ME. OR KANAYA, OR SOLLUX, OR ANY OF THE OTHER UNGRATEFUL MUCUSWIPES I'M STILL RESPONSIBLE FOR, IN CASE YOU FORGOT.

so
are wwe still friends then

HELL NO!

I MEAN

LOOK. YOU WANT SOME TIME TO SORT YOUR SHIT OUT, RIGHT? MAYBE I'LL DO THE SAME.

I'M NOT PROMISING IT'LL BE WHAT IT WAS OR THAT WE'RE GOING TO BE FRIENDS, BUT WHO KNOWS? MAYBE IN TIME I'LL FIGURE OUT HOW TO CURB THAT URGE TO SMACK YOUR DOUCHEY FRAMES OFF YOUR FACE.

[ow]

just fuckin forget about it kar
youvve alwways had enough shit to deal wwith
this just means im not your problem anymore
i can take care a myself

[yeah he's still pretty sore about the "you killed two good friends and blinded another" thing; there's a lot of unresolved resentment here.]

FUCK THAT, AS LONG AS YOU'RE HERE YOU *ARE* ONE OF MY PROBLEMS, LIKE IT OR NOT.

LET'S JUST SEE WHERE THINGS STAND AFTER WE'VE HAD TIME TO BECOME OUR FUTURE SELVES.

im still tryin to find out wwho the fuck that is thanks to sign
i wwont fuckin bore you wwith the details wwhen i find out
tell me fuckin this
are you still friends with gam
the one who killed just as many fuckin people as me

NO, BUT

UH...

FUCK IT, YOU'LL FIND OUT ONE WAY OR ANOTHER.

I'M HIS MOIRAIL.

...
yeah
wwere fuckin done here kar
im NOT your fuckin responsibility
stop pretendin like you givve a shit

LOOK, WILL YOU CRAM THE DRAMATICS DOWN YOUR CHUTE FOR HALF A SECOND?

FIRST OFF, YOU OF ALL PEOPLE *KNOW* A TROLL CAN'T REALLY HELP WHO HE GOES PALE FOR, IT JUST HAPPENS.

SECOND, IT'S NOT LIKE I FORGOT I WAS THE ONE IN CHARGE WHEN ALL OF YOU BLISTERPANNED NOOK STENCHES WENT ROGUE AND KILLED HALF THE GODDAMN TEAM. YOU'RE ALL MURDERHAPPY IDIOTS, BUT IT WAS MY RESPONSIBILITY TOO, ALL RIGHT?

TRUST ME, I'VE HAD PLENTY OF TIME TO SIT IN MY REPLACEMENT HUMAN HIVESTEM AND THINK ABOUT THIS, I *KNOW* I LET EVERYBODY DOWN IN THE MOST SPECTACULAR, SPINECURDLINGLY AWFUL WAY IMAGINABLE. AND IT'S NOT HAPPENING AGAIN, YOU CAN BET YOUR LAST DEATH DOLLAR ON IT. SO SETTLE YOUR FINS, TALK TO SIGNLESS, WHATEVER YOU HAVE TO DO TO BE LESS TERRIBLE IN THE FUTURE. BUT DON'T FLOUNCE OUT OF HERE THINKING I NEVER GAVE A SHIT.

Edited 2012-08-06 09:35 (UTC)

its not fuckin dramatics
its me decidin im not a fuckin wiggler anymore
an i dont fuckin need people wwho dont evven givve half a fuck a howw i feel
the only fuckin person wwho still seems to givve a fuck is gam
no matter howw small that fuck may be
an that in itself should be really fuckin concernin but its not
an you knoww wwhy
because unlike the rest a you hes not fuckin fake
an doesnt try to be
i dont wwant a fuckin leader
i wwant a friend i can talk to
an you obvviously havve no interest in that anymore so just
leavve me alone

YOU KNOW WHAT? AFTER ALL THE SWEEPS I SPENT EXPLAINING WHY YOU CAN'T JUST GO AROUND BEING A HUGE GENOCIDAL JERK TO EVERYBODY AND STILL KEEP FRIENDS AROUND TO NO APPARENT GOD DAMN AVAIL, MAYBE I'M *NOT* INTERESTED IN SITTING IN ON ANOTHER ROUND OF EXPLORING THE CAVERNOUS TWISTS AND TURNS OF YOUR BLOOD-SOAKED PSYCHE.

YOU WANT TO BE ALONE? HAVE THE FUCK AT IT.

[yeah, this'll last. but for right now, he totally means it.]

lectures dont amount to shit wwhen thats all they are
no one wwas there for me wwhen i needed them
no one wwanted me around
so im just doin you the favvor of sayin you dont havve to pretend anymore
because i dont givve a fuck anymore

[Which is why he's buried in a pillow pile crying.]

[It comes a little while later, but Karkat can blame the follow up message on Signless.]

...you knoww kar
youvve got nothin to provve as a leader anymore
you dont need to keep that shit up wwhen youvve already showwn theres no one better than you at it
so wwhy dont you givve it a rest once in a wwhile an just let yourself fuckin relax

[while Eridan was crying into pillows, Karkat was busy punching his. he basically no longer has pillows in his room, just a lot of stuffing and cloth.

he kinda mad.]

IF THERE'S EVER A TIME WHEN I *DON'T* HAVE TO WORK OVERTIME TO KEEP ALL OF YOU IDIOTS OFF EACH OTHER'S THROATS, I'LL THINK ABOUT IT.

[He'll wait until you're done making a mess before he comes in to get his paps on. Because he's a bro like that.]

[oh god Gamzee he needs to be shooshed. many times.]

[Shhh sh sh. Shoosh, bro. It's all good.

A dragon brought pastries.]

[Karkat manages to settle his shit and take a few deep breaths, but he still looks like he'd like to track Eridan down and rip his fins off.]

That whiny hypocritical bag of rancid douche! Why the fuck does BREW keep bringing him back? Is this supposed to be some sort of massive cosmic joke at our expense?

He ain't all that bad. [He rubs Karkat's back a little.]

Pretty motherfuckin' harmless now, ain't he?

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