thirteenth dazzle | July 29, after dark | video

[tauborn]

[Takuto doesn't look sad for this appearance on the network, but he doesn't look characteristically happy, either. He just looks... tired. Maybe it's just that the only light is the glow from the communicator's screen itself, but he looks far more tired than a seventeen year old boy obsessed with singing out his youth and being a source of metaphorical radiance has a right to look.

He sighs, turning the video feed away from himself, into what appears to be total blackness.]

...Some of them are missing. [The darkness of the image focuses in and out of a blurry gray before slowly resolving into tiny pinpricks of light. Stars. There's the sound of a heavy sigh once again.]

I know it's not a thing that's particular to this city or this world or the situation we're all in. People can leave for reasons much worse than a magical device's whim. But all this leaving is exhausting me. People coming and going and coming and going.

[He pauses, recollecting his thoughts as the images blurs, refocuses. The stars twinkle, distantly, silently.]

I think life is a string of people coming and going no matter who or where you are, but… but here, this… I’m getting tired of it.

BREW sent Yuugi away.


[text | private to Yako]

I'm on my roof and I would like some company.

Comments

[itaidakimasu]

{The arm not trapped beneath her own weight is splayed over his stomach, her fingers rubbing a bare patch of skin a little above his hip in an unconscious, thoughtful rhythm.}

The basics, really. Polaris, Orihime and Hikoboshi...not many, though. Give me a lesson?

[tauborn]

[He raises one arm to point.]

That W shape is Cassiopeia. I think she's a queen or something--she's sitting, like on a throne. And Orion is a warrior. He's got a bow, and those three stars there are his belt. Though one of those stars is actually a nebula--so it's not really a star at all. But someday, it will become a galaxy.

[He actually knows a lot, even if he's not sure where he learned it.]

That bright star over there is actually Mars. And up there, that's Jupiter. I don't think Saturn's up yet, though.

[itaidakimasu]

I see. What about Venus? Or…is that one of the ones that's too dim or too far away this time of year?

[tauborn]

She generally sticks pretty close to the Sun. [And personifying celestial bodies with genders now applies to objects other than the Sun and Moon. He's not sure when that happened, but it obviously did.] So you usually only see her at sunrise or sunset, on the horizon. Mercury's even worse about it, though.

[itaidakimasu]

Oh. That makes sense.

{She knows basic astrology, after all. Not quite My Very Educated Mother, given that she's, y'know, Japanese, but enough to make the connections.}

So, what about…that one?

[tauborn]

That one... looks like it might be Capella. [He follows her gaze, fixes his own eyes on a star, and smiles.] Capella is actually four stars--like two sets of twins. But their constellation is a chariot, so I think of them more like two teams of horses.

[And feelings and intuition have a lot to do with stars, for him, at least.]

Merry Christmas <3

[itaidakimasu]

Oh.

{She squints a little, as if that might help her parse four twinkling little dots out of the one. It's a lost cause though, and she ultimately settles back. She might not be a blind bat, but the way things have been going she might need glasses in a year or two.}

Which one is your favorite?

{Because Takuto of all people has to have a favorite.}

Happy Boxing Day!

[tauborn]

From here, it's Aldebaran. [He points at the sky, very low to the horizon.] Aldebaran is Taurus's eye.

[itaidakimasu]

That's…that's the bull, right?

{She totally knows stuff too!

...Kind of.}

[tauborn]

Yes. Those stars there are his horns.

[It's nice that she's not completely clueless, but he wouldn't really mind either way. As long as she lets him just sit and talk quietly about stars, he's content.]

Do you have a favorite, Yako?

[itaidakimasu]

You.

{She...isn't exactly thinking when she says that, so it takes a moment for it to catch up to her. She closes her eyes and drops her head against his chest with a rueful little laugh.}

...sorry.

[tauborn]

[He has to blink a little at her response, and then he places a kiss on the top of her head with a smile.]

Actually, I do have a galaxy. [So her reply isn't really that silly. And he can actually shine, both metaphorically and literally. But his expression turns a little distant after a moment.]

But you can't see it from here. It's not actually in this sky.

[itaidakimasu]

I know. You...told me.

{A pause.}

The first time I came over to do this.

[tauborn]

[He's quiet for a moment, and then he sighs, a hand running up and down her back in motions that are just as soothing for him as they are for her.]

Is it me?

I mean, do you think it's all just chance that everyone I know is leaving? Or maybe, do you think I overreact when people leave?

[itaidakimasu]

No. BREW doesn't care one way or another.

...If you habitually allowed yourself to drown in depression like after Aion-san left, you might be overreacting, maybe.

{She tilts her head up to press a kiss to his jaw.}

There's nothing wrong with mourning a normal amount, though.

[tauborn]

I'm not sure I know what a normal amount is.

[It's a relief to hear the certainty in her voice that it's not him. But he also can't help but feel like he's being betrayed by BREW. He had faith in the magical device for so long... and after the past week's disappearances as well as a few words from Naoto, all that faith is gone.]

Right now I'm not sure if I really even feel sad. I just feel kind of tired. And empty.

[itaidakimasu]

It's still better than drowning. Or...or feeling numb.

[tauborn]

It is much better than drowning.

[He's not entirely sure about the numb thing, and he's not entirely sure yet that he's not headed towards numbness, but there's still some distant voice of reason inside him that tells him she's right, he doesn't really want to be numb, that feeling things--anything, even--is better than nothing.]

Yako, don't ever let BREW take you away. [Not that there appears to be a choice in the matter, but his arms tighten around her with the words anyway.] I know relying on people too much isn't a good thing, but I... I need you. And not just when I'm sad, but when I'm happy, too. So... stay with me... please.

[itaidakimasu]

{Yako knows numbness, knows it intimately, knows the feeling of going through the motions, blank-eyed and hollow, like a doll. She will never let it take root in somebody she loves.}

I'll stay with you for as long as I can, Takuto. I promise.

{She presses a kiss to his neck, mostly because she can't move enough to do it anywhere else.}

I've seen...I've seen a lot of death. A lot of suffering. A lot of...loneliness. There is nothing in this world that lasts forever, but that shouldn't rob anyone of happiness. I'm better for meeting you, and knowing you, and loving you; and even when the day comes that one of us does go home, that won't change.

[tauborn]

[He shifts onto his side, finally done with watching the stars. Because he doesn't need to bother with stars when there's another sort of light shining very brightly beside him.]

That won't change.

[He echoes her words with something a little bit more peaceful in his tone and expression, lifting a hand to brush lightly at her cheek.]

You're beautiful, you know that? And radiant.

[itaidakimasu]

Wh—

{She falters and blushes, a bit caught off-guard by the way he shifts gears. Mind, this is definitely a step up from the edge he was wavering over just a moment ago and far from the first time he's gone about singing her praises, but she just isn't certain what triggered it this time.}

I don't know about radiant…but thank you. It's sweet of you to say so.

[tauborn]

[The trigger is that she's able to make him feel better, with just a few words and her presence. He will be alright without Sugata, without Kaworu, and without Yuugi. And he is better for having met them.]

I wouldn't say it if I didn't believe it. [And for him, there is definitely something magical about the way she looks under the starlight. He curls towards her, placing a kiss on her lips.

It's meant to be chaste, sweet, but it really... isn't.]

[itaidakimasu]

{If this were any other relationship, Yako might push her partner away—gently, and just until she was sure he wasn't trying to cover up the real issues. But this is Takuto, and he has been very…tactile…about his feelings from the get-go.

She leans up into him, sliding her fingers into his hair andcradling his head close.}

[tauborn]

[Maybe he's still just delaying the inevitable breakdown, but for now, her presence is gluing the cracks back together and smoothing over the sharp, raw edges.

His lips start to wander from her mouth, to her cheek, her jaw, the soft spot beneath her ear, her throat...]

[itaidakimasu]

W-Wait.

{Her breath hitches, her voice is a little breathy, but despite her very recent musings she knows she just can't let things continue as they are without a quick disclaimer.}

…clothes stay on, okay?

{Her cheeks, already a little pink, manage to color further.}

I-It's…chilly up here.