soul_campaign | 13th prediction; video; September 14th, afternoon

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13th prediction; video; September 14th, afternoon

[Hyobu smirks at the communicator.]

It's a funny thing, isn't it? That so many of Shibusen's "guests". [He does not say 'us' because, hahaha, as if he's ever been interested in helping out.] Could fight for this war, even die for it and yet we're all still viewed as outsiders. [He doesn't even sound or look upset. Just faintly amused.] Sort of makes any sacrifices on our part seem meaningless, doesn't it?

How nostalgic. I suppose people really are the same no matter what world they're from.

[And then as if he just remembered.] Oh, I made an account so I could share my opionion on the newspaper's Twitter. I tweeted, 'Shibusen sucks'. I'm not sure if I'll ever use it for anything, but if you have an account and you want to follow me, my username is 'keroro'.

[Yeah. He totally used someone else's name to badmouth Shibusen online. (He is totally seven, okay.) Then his lackadaisical manner drops for the first time and he actually looked, dare I say, troubled for a moment.]

And I found a rabbit in Katsuragi Yako's place. I think it might be some kind of emergency ration for her dog, but he's not eating it so I'm not sure. [What was he doing at Yako's place you may ask. Who even knows with this guy. (It's totally not because he was there to take in her dog. Perish the thought.] I mean, I even tied trussed it up and put it in his bowl and everything, but it's like he's not even interested. You don't think he's waiting for me to cook it, do you? I mean, I understand if rabbit stew is a thing he's used to being fed, but there's only so much effort I'm willing to go through for a dog.

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[D doesn't take kindly to the mistreatment of animals so he's wearing a rather judgmental look when he replies.]

I would advise you to untie that rabbit immediately.

And why are you impersonating Mr. Keroro?

But then it'll just run off.

And did you really just call that subpar comedian 'mister'?

If it does, it'll most likely be in fear of you rather than the dog.

We are friends and I don't see why you feel the need to insult him in that manner.

Why? I'm not the one who's supposed to be eating it.

It's not an insult if it's true. And you sound like you might need better friends.

Not for trying to eat it, for torturing it.

How rude. You sound like you need lessons in better manners.

Why does everyone keep telling me I'm torturing it? It's just a bit of harmless fun.

[That he didn't even really do. But everyone's reactions have been so hilarious...]

And you look like you need a lesson in choosing better friends. And maybe a new stylist.

I doubt the rabbit agrees. It's animal cruelty.

[There's a warning tone in his voice, implying he'd better let the rabbit go. If D had his pets here, this young man would have been a strong candidate for some of his special punishment.]

And perhaps, you're the one who's unrefined! [All of his robes were custom made!]

Well if it disagreed then it should have said something.

[Hyoubu...rabbits don't talk.]

That's just your opinion. [Pause.] And I guess Momiji's as well from time to time.

I'm sure it did. You were just too foolish to understand it

[Rabbits talked to D back home...]

I don't know who this Momiji is but it seems I'm not alone in finding your behavior crude.

Then it should learn to speak English. Or Japanese.

[Well, a flying squirrel talked to him back home too. You don't see him trying to apply his unrealistic standards to this world.]

She's this gilr I raised. She things middle aged, fat and bald is cute so I'm not sure I'd trust her tastes.

Even without human speech, there are other ways for it to communicate. You should have seen it was frightened.

And I see no need for you to insult her.

[If they were back home at his shop, D might be tempted to sic T-Chan on him.]

Who gave you permission to enter Detective Katsuragi's residence and torture that rabbit?

[That's breaking and entering, son. Also, it's Yako's place, and Yako was killed, and she was one of Edgeworth's colleagues. She could even be considered a friend.]

[You say that like he hadn't broken into his neighbour's apartment before in order to pepperspray it and then ended up giving his neighbour's cat away without telling his partner when he realized BREW had sent him back...]

No one. And I didn't come here to torture the rabbit. I came here for the dog you know.

[Please get your facts straight.]

Tying up that rabbit would certainly count as torture.

Well, yeah. But I didn't come here planning to do it. I didn't even know she had a rabbit...

[Oh wait.]

Ah, I guess it's the one Sai almost used as a door stop.

Whether or not you knew she owned a pet rabbit is irrelevant. You insult her memory by toying with it.

So, did you and Detective Katsuragi make arrangements beforehand for you to care for her dog, or do you simply wish to prove that you can be of use to society by taking it in?

Edited 2014-06-08 15:28 (UTC)

...are you always this rude?

And he dog's not an 'it'. He's a 'he'. I hope you at least bothered to learn that while she was still alive. Do you even know the dog's name?

[Did he just avoid your questions? If by 'avoid' you mean 'outright ignored' then, yes. Yes he did.]

[Please. He has been called worse things. And he thinks being rude is a lesser crime compared to freaking out a rabbit and breaking into someone's residence. Even if that said person...is dead.

Edgeworth narrows his eyes dangerously.]

That is also irrelevant. Answer my question. [He doesn't have to memorize people's pet names and genders to consider said people as his acquaintances. Wow.]

Edited 2014-06-09 13:01 (UTC)

It's not irrelevant. If you're going to play the part of the concerned friend, then at least prove that you know the dog's name. Otherwise, I don't see what Katsuragi Yako and I had or hadn't come to an agreement to is any of your business.

Companionship is not determined solely on knowing a pet's name. And as a prosecutor, were I not acquainted with Detective Katsuragi, I would still be concerned with who enters her abode without her express permission.

Edited 2014-06-18 15:56 (UTC)

Well, by the time I entered it, it wasn't really her abode anymore.

[Seeing as she was dead and all.]

And would you rather I'd left her dog to starve. I mean. This rabbit is barely a meal.

[A very valid point. He sighs, running a hand through his hair.]

Did it not occur to you that she would have more appropriate food for her dog on hand? More appropriate than a live rabbit?

[ It seems other people already got the rabbit matter covered, so he might as well reply to the part he feels even more strongly about.. ]

Oi, what the hell does it matter what they view us as? It's 'bout tryin' to save people, that's what counts. [ Even if he still gets somewhat of a hollow feeling in his stomach, thinking back on the fact that some of them actually died back there. ]

Saving people. Of course.

[He says it like he was laughing at some kind of private joke only he got.]

I hope you haven't forgotten that whole mess with Erinyes. It's because there are people who think that we are all outsiders, that our victory in Japan doesn't count because the Kishin is one of us, that they'd had so many people following them, you know.

I don't give a fuck what anyone thinks about me. [ At least that's true. Sure, there's some people he wants to impress more than anything, but if a stranger hates it then he certainly isn't going to lie awake about it at night. ]

If they don't give a shit about our victories, then that's fine with me. I don't need thanks for saving anyone's ass, it's just something I want to do.

How noble.

[He sounds neutral enough, but...crap. You're kind of reminding him of someone.]

Even if they turn on you one day?

Sure, I've saved enough jackasses back home too. [ Looking at you there, Rohan..... ]

But if they try to piss me off too much even after I've saved them, I'll gladly deck 'em as well.

[ In other words, just don't piss Josuke off no matter who you are unless you feel like getting punched. His punch reflexes are too strong. Or maybe it's just his instinct to try that of all things as a first resort. ]

[...okay. Wow. You remind him so much of his sister right now it's not even funny.]

Then why save them to begin with? Some people are probably better off dead anyway.

Don't be a dumbass, do you really think we've got any right to decide who lives and who dies? [ It's why he's always disposed of the people he really hated through other means - although arguably being stuck inside a rock with dogs peeing against you for all eternity is probably worse than dying.. ]

Beating 'em up is one thing, letting them die another. As long as I'm around, I'm not just gonna watch anyone die!

...you know. I used to know someone who thought like you. You're both just as annoying.

I don't give a shit whether you think it's annoying or not. I'm gonna do it anyway.

[ What a kid... ]

You....you middle-school-girl-uniform-wearing pervert, why are you using my name for a twitter account, de arimasu?!

Any resemblence to people dead or alive is merely coincidence.

I think I'm going to use a green frog with a hat for my profile picture. Do you think that would be too gross?

You're the one who's gross, de arimasu!

Very mature.

So is that a yes to using a green frog with a hat for my profile picture? I think tomorrow I'll tweet about Molotov cocktails tomorrow.

[Since there's this whole arson thing going on around town right now.]

Edited 2014-06-08 19:16 (UTC)

You! You fraud!

Two can play at this game, de arimasu!

[New twitter account, worldsendowner, created!

First tweet: I smell.]

How does tweeting about Molotov cocktails make me a fraud?

[And what do you mean...

...he checks twitter and. Oh. Real mature.

He retaliates by tweeting: there is a cockroach infestation in the cafe's kitchen.]

Impersonation is what makes you a fraud, you fraud!

[Tweeting: Am I the only one who thinks wearing middle school girl uniforms is a great hobby? #ifeelpretty #ohsopretty #hatersgonnahate]

I'm not impersonating anyone. If someone mistakes me for you because of a username then that's their problem [and yours] not mine.

[Tweeting: Customers are so annoying! So the other day I gave a customer whole milk even though they asked for soy. #takethathipster #hatecustomers #allicareaboutismoney #andlolis]

You're obviously impersonating me, you crook! Get your own life, de arimasu!

Oh, wait!

YOUR LIFE SUCKS, DE ARIMASU.

[Tweeting: Now hiring at World's End, payment in middle school uniforms. Only slightly used! #yolo #hiring #jklosers]

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13th prediction; video; September 14th, afternoon

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