March 17th: We Are Stardust, We Are Golden, and Whatever Impresses Hippie Chicks [Text]

[legend_waitforit_dary]

Good morning, Death City! Somewhere out there, I know that there's a special lady who combines these attributes in one flawless package.

1. Good in bed
2. Great in bed
3. Spectacular in bed
4. Searching for all of the above in a sexy love torpedo named Barney Stinson!

Ladies, especially Weapon ladies, send in your replies before they start pouring in too fast for me to keep track of.

Dudes. Dudes. Cock block at your own risk. Because I will make fun of you if you post here. It will be ruthless, cruel, dirty low-down mockery. You've been warned, gentlemen.

Comments

[ioudas]

You live a privileged life.

[legend_waitforit_dary]

If you mean I've worked hard and been awesome to get here, then you wouldn't be incorrect, bro.

[ioudas]

Still privileged.

[legend_waitforit_dary]

Tell that to the mother who raised me alone because my father, Bob Barker, was too busy hosting "The Price is Right".

[ioudas]

I am going to stop you right there and tell you that I'm from the 1800s and frankly, I do not know what any of those things are.

[legend_waitforit_dary]

The 1800s? That explains so much, bro, you don't even know.

[ioudas]

I'm so happy for you.

[legend_waitforit_dary]

I'm so happy for me, too.

[ioudas]

I take it back, good luck with the search.