Dave Strider (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
beatdownremix) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
soul_campaign2013-02-05 11:44 pm
beatdownremix) wrote in soul_campaign2013-02-05 11:44 pm
1st record | April 30th; Video
[The video switches on to show two color coded teens, one dressed in all red with a cape and awesome shades (with two bottles of apple juice, one in his hand and the other waiting at his side) and the other in all blue with a ridiculously long hood. The red one seems somewhere between totally chill and mildly unnerved while the blue one looks rather pleased and amused.]
Okay we've got a few problems here but the most serious one is someone please tell us we're not the only ones who can see that the sun is looking back at us. Is that like a sun or a giant rock with teeth waiting to eat us like wow that planet sure looks tasty better not eat the middle its too spicy but the north would be an awesome icy snack.
It's like big brother is watching you all the time. Or big sister. Is the sun a girl or a boy? Does anyone know?
[Dave stops to just stare at John for a moment, just giving him an 'are you fucking serious?' look.]
Dude, it's a rock.
But it has a face!
Male or female would imply it has reproductive parts and that's something I'd really rather not think of thanks. It's pretty creepy as is.
[John pauses with a thoughtful look.]
I wonder if the moon has a face. Maybe one is a boy and one is a girl and asteroids are their babies. I wonder if the asteroids have faces?
Wow. Ok, yeah. We're moving onto more important matters now, topic over.
[John rolls his eyes at Dave, he's no fun. He then turns back to the camera with an intrigued look on his face.]
What did that guy mean, I turn into a weapon? How can you turn into a weapon? I'm a human!
[Dave looks like he could care less, though there's a hint of curiosity there as he takes a drink of his juice.]
Yeah, that's pretty much all we need to know since the creepy dude filled us in on the other shit. I've got my AJ now, I'm good.
Okay we've got a few problems here but the most serious one is someone please tell us we're not the only ones who can see that the sun is looking back at us. Is that like a sun or a giant rock with teeth waiting to eat us like wow that planet sure looks tasty better not eat the middle its too spicy but the north would be an awesome icy snack.
It's like big brother is watching you all the time. Or big sister. Is the sun a girl or a boy? Does anyone know?
[Dave stops to just stare at John for a moment, just giving him an 'are you fucking serious?' look.]
Dude, it's a rock.
But it has a face!
Male or female would imply it has reproductive parts and that's something I'd really rather not think of thanks. It's pretty creepy as is.
[John pauses with a thoughtful look.]
I wonder if the moon has a face. Maybe one is a boy and one is a girl and asteroids are their babies. I wonder if the asteroids have faces?
Wow. Ok, yeah. We're moving onto more important matters now, topic over.
[John rolls his eyes at Dave, he's no fun. He then turns back to the camera with an intrigued look on his face.]
What did that guy mean, I turn into a weapon? How can you turn into a weapon? I'm a human!
[Dave looks like he could care less, though there's a hint of curiosity there as he takes a drink of his juice.]
Yeah, that's pretty much all we need to know since the creepy dude filled us in on the other shit. I've got my AJ now, I'm good.
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And yes, she is. Do utilize the encryption feature on your mirror. For evey8ody's safety, 8ut most especially yours.
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mine? why me?
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And my apologies, that is a general "you." Those that the 8atterwitch knows a8out are most especially suscepti8le to her interests.
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are you uh...
shit, i'm trying to remember what vriska said...
spinneret? a troll pirate?
how would the batterwitch know about me? i've never met her...
1/2 [text/private]
One second...
2/2 [video/private]
My name is Aranea.
[video/private]
Hey, you have the same horns as Vriska!
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Hi, Aranea, nice to meet you.
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To answer your question, the Batterwitch is a veritable ancient that has transcended multiple times and multiple universes. She was the guardian of your grandmother, and in another universe she was a guardian...
...of you.
/not here
/not here
No, wait, stay here, you might need to calm him down.]
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[Insert one of those long pauses that goes on just long enough for it to start to juuuuust get awkward.]
WHAT????????
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It's true!
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Stair... mother? Oh! Adoptive mother.
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Thus, in that universe, you were the ward of the Batterwitch, while your Grandmother took the mantle of the player character, and Maid of Life.
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Holding...
Holding...
Holding...
Okay, he's back.]
Alternate me's life must have been a nightmare.
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He had a long, full life. Died of old age, and became a very successful standup comedian.
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