[Text] 8th May

[bowdown]

we gots ta krill shibusens bassholes anemones
but we cant krill our own
shits unfair yo


[ Private to: JOHN EGBERT ]
yo heir
wat last fin you rememba befo comin here


[ Private to: STEIN ]
bathtubs drain is clogged  [ blame her hair ]

Comments

[soulsutures]

You're going to need to learn to control that urge while you're here anyway, compromises must be made.

[He's not really a fan of the brown sugar part, so after a bite he moves onto the next one.]

Various reasons to be honest. On a professional level it's my job to do what I can for the guests while we have all of you here. On a more personal level, I've always been highly intrigued by lifeforms that were rare or hard to come by. A chance to study trolls more closely spikes my interest. I'm a scientist just as much as I am a professor and a Meister, perhaps even more so at times.

[bowdown]

I ain't botha the ottas tho they should be culled. Already doin compromise right there, homie. Dun want your angelfish ta sleep with the fishes, dun bring the fucka here.

[ Meenah isn't coming, just don't bring the mutant, it's easy.

Condesce watches him move to the next cake before she turns around again ]

Opportunaty ta sea the supreme race. Shoulda be proud of youshellf.

[soulsutures]

[Really, there's only so much he can ask for without having to resort to more trouble than it's worth.]

Fine, I'll add in a note suggesting he only apply at his own risk. And there's a chance Meenah won't allow Aranea to volunteer either, which may be for the best as her and I never got along to begin with.

[She's far too preachy and opinionated for his tastes, though it would be a wonderful opportunity to cut her open while she's under the effects of the drugs...

Stein actually doesn't mind the blackberry coffee cake and ends up finishing that one.]

The glaze on the blackberry one was a bit too sweet for my tastes, but overall preferable than the other.

[bowdown]

[ now she hopes he will apply only to smash his face in.

Well. Condesce definitively agrees about Aranea; but alas, she needs a blue blood if she wants to bring back at least part of her race. Sacrifices have to be made, even if it's her patience on the line. Of course, if Shibusen allowed her, she would end this tomfoolery quiet easily by breaking everyone's legs.

At Steins' words, Condesce's head lifts up, far more interested in the whole topic now ]

More coffee or you's fin with the amount?

[soulsutures]

[Her urge to break everyone's legs is the entire reason he's her... keeper? babysitter? parole officer? He really doesn't even know anymore, what started as him just wanting to keep an eye on a potentially murderous guest until she calmed down has ended up with a house guest he thinks is probably going to be with him for the duration of her stay in Death City.]

A little more wouldn't hurt, but it wasn't bad as it was. If you leave it with the same amount, it would probably go better with a cup of coffee to make up for it. Maybe a little less glaze on the top.

[bowdown]

[ moirail, it's called moirail. ]

Ya jus' dun' like suga. [ she knows that. But she might try to make a cake with half the sugar in it, just to see his reaction. ]

You reely gonna gimme a seawater swimmin' pool?

[soulsutures]

[He doesn't even know what that word means.]

Not particularly.

[But he's been eating a lot more of it lately because of her.]

Above ground pools usually take only a day or two to assemble, and it's probably best we set it up now before the summer starts heating up. I'd suggest the public pools to save time but those have chemicals in them to keep them clean. If I remember correctly, there was an unfortunate young violet blooded troll who found out about the chemicals the hard way. Salt water pools aren't as popular because they require more maintenance, but that shouldn't be a problem so long as you're willing to keep it clean.

[Though really it's a pain enough to get her to clean up after herself in the kitchen.]

Or we can see what we can do about hiring someone to clean it for you if you'd trust them near your pool.

[bowdown]

[ one day you will listen about troll romance. ]

Yeah, I know. Not gonna approach that that carp. Ma gills dun' like that shit you pink monkeys pour in yo water. The fuck is up in yo heads?

[ and honestly, you already know the answer ]

Let sumone else clean that shit.

[soulsutures]

[Maybe. Not like he'll have a say in the matter either way.]

Chemicals to kill germs is the fastest way to keep something clean. It's just as poisonous to humans if we swallow too much of it, but even the smallest amount can be deadly to fish. Obviously aquatic trolls are more resilient so instead of deadly it's more of an annoying rash.

[He's not at all surprised by her answer about cleaning.]

We'll sail that ship when we get to it.

[He meant to say cross that bridge but the damned sea references are getting to him.]

[bowdown]

Shitty as shell. Not gunna be hard ta bring sea water to the middle of the desert, yo?

[ well, not really her problem. You do your thing, Stein, as long she is happy.

But as she hears the reference, Condesce snorts and giggles a bit ]

It's funny cuz imma sea dwella~!

[soulsutures]

There's ways of making a salt water pool without having to use actual sea water.

[Otherwise it would be manageable but take far too much time and effort. He can't help the quirk of amusement though, she's so damn easy to please.

He lights up one of his cigarettes, taking a drag and staring at the cake still left on the plate while debating if he should just finish it off or throw it away.]

[bowdown]

S'long can't tell da diff, same shit.

[ Don't you dare to throw it away. She already had to listen to John calling her cakes "lame".

The Condesce finally gets up, this time sitting on Stein's desk and look at her not giving a damn about the papers there ] Wazz' that fo'? [ she points to his head.

She never asked about the whole screw on his head, did she? ]

[soulsutures]

[He doesn't look pleased at her hair all over his desk, but at least it hasn't knocked anything over yet. He'll eat the cake when he's done with his cigarette.

The attention brought to his screw however is a bit of a surprise since he didn't think anything mattered to her unless it concerned her. In partial response to her question he reaches up and starts to slowly turn it, the creaking noise almost an echo in the quiet room.]

I installed it as a way to adjust my mind's focus when necessary.

[bowdown]

[ Condesce tilts her head before she sketches a smirk, amused. She listens to the sound, but it was very uneventful, since she actually expected to hear some think pan mush going on there. ]

Ya did it to yoshellf? Shit, man, ya craysea. [ the troll does laugh ]

[soulsutures]

[He leans on the back of his chair with a smirk, gesturing to the stitches across his face.]

These are all over most of my body, what sort of scientist would I be if I didn't turn my experiments on myself along with trying them on others?

[bowdown]

There's only one of yoshellf. There's plenty of ottas, tho; lots of fish in the sea.

Dunno why ta do it to yoshellf 'nless it be worthy. [ she steals a bit of the cake with her fingers ] Was it?

[soulsutures]

There are, and each and every one is just as different inside as seashell can be on the outside. They look the same to the untrained eye, but there's always differences if you know what to look for.

[He takes another deep drag of his cigarette, exhaling the smoke in the shape of a skull.]

If it wasn't worth it, I wouldn't have done it in the first place.

[bowdown]

All fuckin' lowbloods. [ so who the fuck cares if they are a tiny bit different to the untrained eye? She sure doesn't. ]

N' who da fuck cares fo' one seashell. [ she sure doesn't. ]

Yo, did'ja 'now I tried ta make trolls back on ma Earth?

[soulsutures]

Everyone has their choice as to what details they pay attention to.

[And she just caught a bit more of his.]

How did you go about doing that?

[It's not disapproval, or horror of the idea that heavily implies human experimentation. It's a high amount of intrigue and curiosity from him.]

[bowdown]

[ Condesce smirks wider. Oh, she got him hooked alright ]

Gurl gots plenty of time ta do watervs she wants. Try watervs she wants too. 'Sides, ma planet, ma rules, ma servants, ma mothaglubbin' bitches and ma toys.

Clonin', genetic experiments shit, robots, drones. [ her smirk drops. None of her experiments really worked, thanks to Lord English.

But the motherfucker wasn't here. Nor was her lusus that insisted on killing every being she attempted to resurrect from her kind. That did make her quite happy, in a way, though she would have loved to have her lusus to install terror in this crappy planet ]

[soulsutures]

[He watches her expression fall and knows, though he didn't need that to tell him she failed. He could understand the appeal of owning your own world, but unfortunately that's where they'd have to disagree. He knows he needs order and wants nothing to do with the chaos the witches want to bring about.

Honestly, the only reason he's not worried about Condesce trying to side with the witches is because of her superiority complex and refusal to be a team player. They weren't as nice as Shibusen about that crap.]

From the data I gathered, it would be impossible to genetically alter a human to be more like a troll because despite striking similarities there's too many differences for it to ever work.

[bowdown]

Pfff, don't I know? [ she scoffs, getting off the desk ]

Ya monkeys can't even accept bettament. Bitches be biologically incompatible. Tho I did change yo blood colo', not even dat. [ She goes back to sit at the couch ]

Dun' want humans no mo'. Dun' need. [ she's got the trolls now ]

[soulsutures]

[He finally finishes off his cigarette and puts it out, readjusting the papers on his desk before picking up the fork to take another bite of the left over cake.]

There's just some things that are nontransferable unfortunately, you can only do so much when working with different genetics.

[She seems so sure of herself, and he can understand being glad for others of her species again but unfortunately.]

With how BREW works, you could be right back where you came from at any time. Same for the rest of the trolls here. Unfortunately there's still nothing we can do about the unpredictability of how it works.

[bowdown]

Naut goin' back. [ Nope. She has things mapped already, she doesn't want to go back and she has no plans on doing so.

She will fight this fucking war, take BREW for herself, make her wish and conquer this place. ]

The fuck you guys use somefin like dat and can't even control it, yo?

[soulsutures]

The best anyone of you can do is hope. We've lost countless guests that were vital to operations they started here.

[Kakashi and Gai were both major losses in his opinion, he will miss those two. But he knows better than to become too attached to any of the guests. What the hell is he doing with her]

We weren't aware this was the effect it would have, unfortunately there's really no way of telling exactly how it BREW works or how to directly control it once it started. We can just work with what we've got.