feb. 06 ♣ voice; without you

[fourleafbrat]

[The communicator clicks on to heavy breathing.

You'd be breathing heavily too, if you just spent the last few hours or so of your life, tearing apart your brother's apartment--and then your own out of sheer frustration. She knows what's happened, though, and for once, there's nothing she can do to change it.

There's no one she can kill that would change BREW's mind, and she's not even in the mood to celebrate the successful rescues.]

...Hey. Instead of whining every time someone's been sent home, has anyone ever figured out why BREW decides kick them to the curb?

[It doesn't seem right that it gets to throw people out like useless trash. Especially not someone like Snake.]

It's not like I've been doing all that much... [Aside from maybe some meaningless deliveries--only because no one else could be bothered to do them.] Why am I still here?

[She's just going to mope and generally be pouty and angry and miserable.

Whoops?

...Click!]

Comments

(whoops repost)

[fourleafbrat]

[Well they're technically here because of a war. But Clover was speaking more specifically, and she'll give him a benefit of the doubt and assume he was, too.]

And how might we go about doing that, when none of us have a clue?

No worries!

[proudambassador]

If we do not help, would BREW send us home? The useless, they would not grant the wish, hm? Or would it keep them out of spite until they did something? The clue, it could be gained by seeing who it sends home, yes? If they fight, or if they do not.

[fourleafbrat]

...Uh-huh. And judging by my responses here, no one's bothered to record any of this stuff at all. Not a very useful clue, without any data.

[Though all of this is pretty qualitative anyway. How does one define "participating" or "fighting" in this war, and when is it enough to count?

...She doesn't really know. She doesn't know how BREW thinks.]

[proudambassador]

Then start, no? Or ask those who may know? You are young yet. An answer, it can be found.

[fourleafbrat]

...What about you? M'sure you've lost someone before. Seems like everyone has.

[proudambassador]

Me? No, no. Myself, I do not wind up with people who care about me, or vice-versa, hm? I am old and fat and loud and this, it is not a combination to make friends with.

[fourleafbrat]

...Tch. [She finds herself unable to argue. Though despite her mood, she's not bothered by him, either.] And that doesn't bother you?

[proudambassador]

It is easier, no? They do not have to worry about me, and me, I do not have to worry about them.

[fourleafbrat]

I don't think it's always that easy.

[She can't not care about her own brother.]

[proudambassador]

Perhaps it is not. But if it is fooling myself, then I am at least fooling myself in a way that I wish to be fooled, yes?

[fourleafbrat]

...How am I supposed to fool myself in the first place?

[A lot of "fools" in that question; his speech isn't the easiest to understand. But Clover's smart enough to get the gist of what he's saying.]

[proudambassador]

Have you never done it?

[He thinks.]

It is when you tell yourself that you did not mess up when you did. It is when you do something that is hurtful and you pretend to not notice, you act like you did not actually hurt anyone, hm? It is when you tell yourself that you are better than others when you are not, that your choice was right when it was not. It is... It is a pride thing.

[fourleafbrat]

...A pride thing.

[She listens carefully with a sigh, turning away from the communicator once so she's not breathing directly into it. All the examples he's cited.

This wisdom...

Where did it come from, she wonders?]

So in my case, you think I should convince myself there is a reason I'm here. That...the city needs me somehow, hm?

[Seems self-centered and "prideful" enough. In a way, she'd have to go from there, because without reason...she'd have no motivation to do much of anything.]

[proudambassador]

Exactly, my dear girl! You matter, I matter, everyone matters, even in a world with no gods! Well. I am guessing that they have no gods. I have seen no statues and no temples, and that, it says that they are without, hm?

[fourleafbrat]

[...ha! Well, now they're straying from the topic a bit--but you know, she really doesn't mind it.]

Guess so. Since BREW hardly counts...

[As a god, that is. There's a bit of an eyeroll here, but after a moment she goes on:]

What's your name, anyway?

[proudambassador]

Mine, it is Londo Mollari. You may call me by either, yes? And what of you? What is your name?

[fourleafbrat]

...Clover.

[Only now does she remember, of course, that she can simply check the communicator; but hearing his name directly is a bit more satisfying anyway.

...Makes her feel a bit better about giving out her own.]

[proudambassador]

Clover. That is a plant, no? Leafy?

[fourleafbrat]

It is.

Four "leafy"s and it means good luck.

[proudambassador]

So to someone you are good luck, my good Clover?

1/2

[fourleafbrat]

[!!

Good luck...to someone?

To Snake--]

[fourleafbrat]

...Guess I hadn't thought of it like that.

[Y-Yeah, she's a bit flustered now.]

[proudambassador]

No? You should, my dear girl. You should.

[fourleafbrat]

Heh.

Thanks-- I think. [She's scratching the back of her head awkwardly, not sure what to say after that.

Maybe she's even a little annoyed that she hadn't thought of it first. But she keeps quiet, her fist clenching a little bit tighter (subtly) as she ponders if there's anything else she even needs to say.

She didn't think she'd had that much to begin with...]