Entry #A-12: "Assimilation" [February 13, Audio]

[dead_black_eyes]

[A smooth, soft voice can be heard over the networks.]

I'm getting the feeling that this consumer-driven holiday invented by greetings-card companies is more of an affair in Death City than it was in my own world.

While I don't approve of holidays cashing in by making people feel obligated to buy things for others, I don't have a problem if people feel obligated to buy things for me.

There are some stores selling fine chocolates. I like these in particular, so... as a true gourmand and an expert at gauging human emotions, I will give you excellent, informed romantic advice in exchange for any of the following.

[TEXT]

1. Creme buttermints (package of 12)
2. Vanilla caramel truffles (package of 16)
3. Milk fudge squares (NO NUTS, package of 8)
4. Hand-dipped marshmallow dream bars (package of 2)
5. Cotton-candy heart sticks (package of 1, the most cost-effective option)
6. Belgian nougat sprinkled in gold leaf (package of 1, the least cost-effective option but I'll certainly notice you.)
7. Candied orange slices (Package of 10)

[/End TEXT]

Comments

[Audio]

[dead_black_eyes]

You could bring me some, in exchange for some Valentine's Day advice.

[Audio]

[silicomb]

Or I could eat the whole lot of them and we'd both be better off in life.

But okay, sure, I'll bite. Where do I find these shining confectionary treats?

[Audio]

[dead_black_eyes]

Death By Pastry.

About two feet from the left edge of the counter.

[Audio]

[silicomb]

Despite myself, I'm on my way.

...








Where the fuck do you hole up anyway.

[Audio]

[dead_black_eyes]

That was almost a question about romance, if it had been phrased just a little differently...

[Audio]

[silicomb]

NOPE. Live, where do you live!

[Audio]

[dead_black_eyes]

Oh, I see.

Mm...

[PRIVATE]

Death City Heights, Unit 7, 3rd floor, apartment B. With my partner, Light Asahi.

[Audio] private

[silicomb]

I want nothing to do with your mammalian reproductive practices, bro.

Shoo Justice Man out, I don't want some weirdo listening in on sensitive exchanges like this.

[ oh man he nearly made himself laugh. ]

[Audio] private

[dead_black_eyes]

I've found that he doesn't listen much to me.

Besides. He's not here. He works today. We have the place to ourselves.

[Audio] private

[silicomb]

Man, what kind of a Meister do you have?

[ gotta get those fuckers under control, bro. ]

Do I detect bitterness?

[Audio] private

[dead_black_eyes]

Bitter? No, I'm not bitter. He'll be back. Just not for a few hours.

[Audio] private

[silicomb]

Oh-kay then, that wasn't intense at all.

I'll be by in a few then.

[Audio] private

[dead_black_eyes]

Don't eat all the Cotton Candy Heart Sticks on the way here...

[Audio] private

[silicomb]

No guarantee, man, but I'll give it a shot.

[Audio] private

[dead_black_eyes]

Give it your best shot, and I'll be interested to know the worth of your best.