Text || May 2

[3rdbest]

Few announcements and a question.

First, I’m Matt and I have a business called Black Mesa. It's a House Call Technician business, and we fix computers, broadcasting and wireless systems, business equipment and security system. If anyone is interested or just wants a job, call me maybe.

Second, I’m doing missions, have a nice record, and kind of want to keep going. So I’m currently looking for a Meister who would be cool with going on missions. I’m a Weapon, a Portal gun; I shoot regular bullets and also create Portals.

Third, imagine you have raw steaks. How hard it is to cook them? And how do cook them exactly?


[ PRIVATE TO: DUO ]
Duo. I hope you didn’t forget our date tonight.


[ PRIVATE TO: NEAR ]
A word, please.

Comments

text; private

[3rdbest]

Nope.

I smell like raw meat and beer.

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[silicomb]

gr0ss.
what does beer smell like anyway.

text; private

[3rdbest]

Idk how to describe it, dude.
You never smelled beer?

text; private

[silicomb]

never had 0ccasion t0.
do i LO0K like troll nic0las cage to y0u?

text; private

[3rdbest]

Well, best you stay away from it, you aren't old enough yet.

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[silicomb]

i am s0 old en0ugh.
but ok fine just t0 appease your delicate alien sensibilities i'll sit back 0n my heels like a go0d grub.

text; private

[3rdbest]

Not old enough to drink, even if you are an alien, dude.

When you get to 16, I will give you your the first beer to pop that cherry.

text; private

[silicomb]

s0 next sweep then.
ok i can wait.
i h0ld you acc0untable though if it tastes like ass.

text; private

[3rdbest]

Have you ever tasted ass?

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[silicomb]

not that i recall.
but i kn0w i can always turn to y0u for reference.

text; private

[3rdbest]

Sorry, still don't know that part of life. And not exactly interested in it.

If you want reference, ask Mello or Near.

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[silicomb]

0h my god matt gr0ss.

[ but he's still laughing anyway ]

text; private

[3rdbest]

I did not start this conversation.

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[silicomb]

y0u carried it ont0 this topic, y0u may as well have.

text; private

[3rdbest]

You mentioned the taste of ass, Sollux.

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[silicomb]

it was a figure 0f speech!
is this a lo0k into y0ur twisted and kinky psyche?
send help, i need a custodian.

text; private

[3rdbest]

It was a nasty figure of speech.
Don't you have a custodian, though? That dad of yours.

text; private

[silicomb]

... that what 0f mine?

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[3rdbest]

We talked about this.

Psii.

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[silicomb]

woah 0k.
we share the exact same genetic code, man.
that's it.
we ain't part 0f no familial unit.
if anything he is s0llux v.2.
the original being right here.
represent.

text; private

[3rdbest]

Your dad clone.

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[silicomb]

the big me cl0ne.

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[3rdbest]

I'm still going to call him your dad, you know that, right?

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[silicomb]

y0u're insufferable.

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[3rdbest]

You love me.