VIDEO

[redregrets]

[There is quite abruptly a very upset teenage troll on the screen. He's glaring at the camera as if it has personally offended him. Normally he would have done this over text, but he wants to see familiar faces, and besides, the best speeches aren't given over text.]

Listen up, nooksniffers. Here's how this is going to go. I don't have time for this war. I'm already fighting in one, and that one I actually give a shit about. Since I can't leave until this place stops getting his ass kicked, the plan is to win this stupid war as quickly as possible so we can all get back to our miserable lives wherever we came from.

Okay? Good. So, what's being done around here to get everyone battle ready? Whatever it is, sign me up. I need to figure out this whole fucking "being a weapon" thing. [He even does the air quotes for added effect.] Talk to me about the training and shit. Otherwise, keep your squawk blisters shut and brutally destroy those Kishin things.

With one exception. [He raises his pointer finger at the camera. It is not the finger he's used to raising, and he very nearly flubs that up. He's used to giving speeches over text, alright. Maybe he should have done that instead...] I've already seen a couple of familiar faces around here, which leads me to believe there might be more somewhat tolerable assholes around here that I might be familiar with. If you are one of those losers, report to me so I know who's here and therefore not in as much grave danger. Worrying about you bulgelickers is a full time fucking job, alright, and I don't want to have to worry any more than I have to, because it's annoying as shit.

Alright, I'm out. [There's a little fumble and a muffled curse, along with a lovely view of the floor of Karkat's place in Casualty Communal before the feed cuts out.]

Comments

[video]

[heavenly_earth]

[Why hello, Karkat~ Someone remembers you and your mouth from before, so he's just gonna look a little amused, sorry]

There's training every morning at the park from 6 in the morning until 9. Breakfast is provided, and there are instructors dedicated to a number of areas, including Weapon transformation.

[video]

[redregrets]

Oh. Uh, thanks. _{[Wow, he wasn't expecting this speedy of a response, especially because he has no clue who this person is. He looks human, but Karkat isn't really sure he should jump to conclusions in this place.]} Are you the guy in charge of that?

[video]

[overkrill]

Probubbly shouldn't have done that, crabcake.

[Meenah smirks and leans her cheek on her hand, eyebrows rising.]

You're reely gonna regret it when she sees this.

[video]

[redregrets]

Yeah, but text would have been more obvious. I might as well have asked her to look into my blood color that way. Besides, there's no other way to communicate here, and I might get her attention, but I might also get the attention of people who I actually like.

Fuck, Meenah, I know it's stupid, but I'd rather she saw this now then have us run into each other in dark fucking alley later.

video not yet on 1/4? maybe?

[scribes]

[Look at that face]

[scribes]

[Look at that face]

[scribes]

[IT'S FUCKING ADORABLE]

and now it is

[scribes]

[AHEM. Ok Di. You are an adult. She takes a moment to compose herself before turning the feed on and smiling.]

There is morning training where you can go to learn more about being a Weapon and how to transform. It is a good place to go looking for a partner as well so that you may be sent on missions.

[bowdown]

throw yourshellf off da mothafuckin stairs

[ actually, she is being a lot more helpful than you think. falling off stairs IS a way to turn into your weapon form 38D ]

[video]

[redregrets]

_{[As much as he wants to respond with text because that's what he's used to, he's going to stick with video. With any luck, she won't recognize his face, and he might be able to put off the whole culling thing. Typing back in gray would just make things worse. If she does know the Signless's face, and has made the connection...well, he's screwed either way.]} Mother fuck I knew I'd have to deal with you. I'm not throwing myself off the fucking stairs. I'm going to figure out how to do this the right way. Thanks for the input._{[Which basically means fuck off he really really doesn't want to have to deal with you. Of course, he doubts she'd listen even if he told her that straight out. Maybe she'd ignore him more if he was straight forward. God, why did she have to be here?]}

[Video]

[pranksterheir]

[Oh my god, is that...]

... Karkat?

[Video]

[redregrets]

John, holy shit you're here. _{[This is one face he wasn't expecting to see, even if he's seen a lot of faces today he never thought he would. Still, he's glad to see him. It's been a while, and this means he's safe.]} Where the fuck are you?

[text]

[consider8]

Can it really 8e?
Is it possi8ly??
Oh, wonderful!
That is soooooooo gr8!!!!!!!! ::::D

[text]

[redregrets]

WHAT EXACTLY IS GREAT ABOUT ME BEING HERE?
IT MEANS I'M NOT BACK WHERE I'M SUPPOSED TO BE DOING WHAT I NEED TO DO.
ISN'T THAT WHAT YOU CARE ABOUT?
THIS IS ARANEA I'M ASSUMING, BECAUSE NO OTHER SERKET WOULD SAY WONDERFUL AND MEAN IT UNSARCASTICALLY.

video; private

[beatdownremix]

[Yeah, this totally calls for a video chat. He takes a little longer because he had to go and stick his nose into everything, see what's already been said and what's up. As an after thought, he slaps on a private filter just in case. His and Karkat's conversations are usually better off private, just to be on the safe side.]

See you've already talked to Neji and John, so let me fill you in on the minor shit they overlooked. Neji's pretty cool, he's my boss and the leader of the Watch, which you need to join. You can join first train later, I can hook you up with me on my night shift since John only joins me on the day shift. Morning training's mandatory for all Watch members anyway and it sucks balls to get up that early but it's manageable and they don't mind if you nap during it so long as you're actually there.

And like John says, feel free to come join us man we've got a spare room. Was gonna offer it to one of my bros, but Dirk and his other self both left around the same time she did just recently. If you wanna team up with Meenah for some missions that's cool, fyi I'm a meister too so I could try and help you out with the whole weapon thing, I was helping John and Dirk try to figure it out and you should be a lot fucking easier than the latter.

Last thing I remember from back on the meteor was Rose getting totally wasted and going off on her date with Kanaya. Seeing as how I just saw you mention an intervention with John, that does not bode well at all what the fuck am I going to have to look forward to dealing with?

Anyway, sup?

video; private

[redregrets]

Hi to you too, idiot.

God damn it Dave I kind of need the fucking training. As much as I want to jump right into doing shit, I kind of need to figure out how to transform before I start on the Watch.

Alright, I wouldn't mind working with you and John too. You're good with blades, anyway, even if they're fucking lame ass swords. I'll check out your stupid hive too. John will probably show me around whether I like it or not.

I shouldn't have mentioned it. I didn't realize you two were behind me on the timeline, but yeah, things do not work out well, or at least, you seem to think so. I still don't get why it's so bad. She's more cheerful and shit.

Besides being bombarded with a shit ton of information all at once, not fucking much. You? You're still alive, which is a good fucking sign. How long have you been here?

video;

[soulsutures]

[Since no one else seems to be doing it, Stein may as well take care of it himself. He sends Karkat this file before turning on the video. And Karkat gets a view of a man with a screw through his head, sitting backwards on a chair. If he looks, just behind him on a desk are notes written in what appear to be Alternian.]

My name is Dr. Franken Stein, one of the staff members up at Shibusen, and I've just sent you a file that covers all the basic information you'll need to know so I suggest you read it over. If you have any further questions, feel free to ask.

[He pauses to take out a cigarette, because he knows he's going to have to bring it up.]

On the matter of Condesce, I wouldn't worry too much if I were you. While she's not fond of anyone who shares her blood or mutant bloods, I can guarantee that you have nothing to fear from her so long as you keep a respectable distance or if you see her with me. The only place you may run into her is at morning training if you attend as she runs a cake stand there, but I'm always there to make sure no trouble is started so you won't have to worry.

I'll have a jar of a sopor substitute sent to wherever you'll be staying, it was created actually at your own request when you were last here, however that was some time ago and improvements have been made to it since. As of right now, it's only a jar that you leave open next to your bed and it helps as it's supposed to, but I'm always running experiments to improve it's quality.

video;

[redregrets]

...Uh. Hi. _{[Well this is not something you see everyday. That looks really fucking painful, but alright, he won't mention the gigantic screw thing if Stein won't.]} Thanks. I'll be sure to look at it.

Yeah, about her. ...I sort of pissed her off. Like really fucking badly. I swear to god I didn't mean to, but she's out to kill my friends so I couldn't really help it. So, I'm really fucking worried about that. How could you guarantee she wouldn't bother me? You aren't her partner, are you?

You're making sopor? _{[No fucking way. He hasn't slept in sopor for sweeps now. Even if it's just a substitute it's still awesome. Sopor seems like a luxury now.]} Why? Just to make us feel comfortable? Did the other me warn you about what happens when we ingest sopor? Or is this substitute different?

video;

[sermonize]

At least you are willing to admit your worry this time around.

video;

[redregrets]

Yeah, well, I don't know when that other Karkat was from on the timeline, but my friends have never been in more danger, and that amount of danger will continue to increase from here on out. Forgive me for being just a little fucking concerned.

[voice | private]

[want_the_world]

Hey, Karkat.

[It's obvious he doesn't remember being here before. Mello's tempted to call him 'Cancer' anyway, but decides someone who's just been kidnapped doesn't need extra annoyance.]

Charming as ever, I see. Read this.

[He links to the FAQ he keeps.]

[voice | private]

[redregrets]

I will never get used to having random strangers know who I am. Fuck you, by the way. I am the epitome of class.

_{[He takes a quick second to scan through the FAQ.]} This is helpful shit. One question. Who the fuck is Excalibur? Do I even want to know?

[text] gotta hit you with both of mine XD

[00110010_00110011]

am not sollux
am sure that wiill be obviious quiickly
but wanted to warn riight away

iif helps
have been told that are returned to tiime left iif are sent back to own uniiverse

[text] aww yeah

[redregrets]

YOU'RE ANOTHER ANCESTOR THEN.
PSIIONIIC RIGHT?

ALRIGHT, THAT RIGHT THERE?
THAT IS THE BEST FUCKING NEWS I'VE HAD SINCE I GOT HERE.
I'M AM OVER HERE DANCING A GOD DAMN JIG WHILE BEAUTIFUL FUCKING HARP MUSIC PLAYS IN THE BACKGROUND.
DUDE, WHY THE HELL DIDN'T YOU SHOW UP TO TELL ME THIS SOONER?

[video]

[helpstroubled]

[ Dis face. ]

Well then. Aren't you just lovely.

[ Not a question. Definitely not a question. ]

[video]

[redregrets]

_[UM.] ...Are you fucking high? Is your video smudged? Are you fucking blind? Wait, that was sarcasm. It has to be sarcasm.

[video]

[snowman]

Don't knock the stairs thing, it actually does help figure out your weapon form. And falling off a roof worked pretty well for me, too.

[video]

[redregrets]

Are you fucking nuts? Why would you voluntarily put yourself in a situation where you could severely injure yourself or worse just to see your stupid weapon form? That's ridiculous. I'm going to figure it out without pulling any dangerous fucking stunts, thanks.

[video]

[diedforyoursins]

[well there's a somewhat familiar face.]

Hello again. I assume you do not remember anything from your previous stay here?

[video]

[redregrets]

Believe me I wish I could. It's really fucking irritating feeling like you don't know shit when people are talking to you.

[ video; ]

[blue_wayfinder]

There are instructors at morning training who can teach you how to transform.

[She does recognize him, but she hadn't know him, well. Besides, she imagined it would be bad enough to run into so many people who recognize him even though he doesn't know them at all.]

[ video; ]

[redregrets]

Yeah, I'm going to go for sure. I'm glad there's already a decent system in place. I wasn't really sure what to expect, but it looks like you're actually making a decent effort to win this fucking war here.

[ voice; ]

[atleast80]

The only way you'll learn to transform is by throwing yourself down some stairs, the higher the better.

[Not really, but just suggesting it to people hadn't worked in the past.]

[ voice; ]

[redregrets]

There's no way I'm doing that. It's stupid and unnecessary, and I'm not planning on hurting myself because some idiot told me throw myself down fucking stairs.

[video]

[starfruitfrog]

[Keroro recognizes Karkat. One of the reasons being he made keychains in Karkat's likeness and got huge amounts of money from it.]

Well. You'd survive falling down the stairs, since you're a Weapon and everything, de arimasu. But it's probably safer just to go to Morning Training, de arimasu.

And welcome back, Karkat-dono.

[video]

[redregrets]

Another one who recognizes me from last time, huh. I guess I'm going to have to ask your name again, seeing as I can't remember shit all about you.

And yeah, I'd survive, but I still wouldn't exactly call it a pleasant fucking experience to fall down stairs even if I know I'm going to live.

Video

[nofarplaneyet]

*Oh look who's back but with no memory*

I'm pretty sure you've been harassed all day long with details and people claiming that they know you when you clearly don't remember them.

If there's anything else that anyone hasn't covered, let me know.

Video

[redregrets]

Yeah, it's been fucking terrible, let me tell you. It's irritating as shit when people know things about me and I don't know anything about them.

I've got a couple guides and shit thrown my way, so I think I'm alright for the moment. If you know any tips for transforming besides fucking throwing yourself down stairs, that would help.

[video]

[kill_some_time]

You again.

[video]

[redregrets]

Do you have a problem with me? Did I fuck you over last time I was here, because if I did, fuck you, it was your fault because you're probably an asshole.

audio;

[silicomb]

Took you long enough, fucknub.

[ He is sounding as casual as he possibly can. ]

audio;

[redregrets]

_{[He knew Sollux was here, but hearing his voice and knowing he's around are two very different things. He tries very hard to keep the grin out of his voice.]}

And what the fuck were you doing while I talked to all these other assholes, fondling your fucking bulge? What kind of shit best friend waits around until I've had to deal with a huge undulating mass of pure hoofbeastsshit to say fucking hello? That's what I want to know.